D-Day

As most of you know, we survived the first day of the daycare experience. And when I say we, I mean me. I was a total wreck anticipating this milestone for Vivie, which most of you can account for as you listened to me cry! But back to school time came, and it was time for mommy to stop the tears and be a big girl. Vivie certainly was one!
I think the fear and anticipation of the actual event was much worse than the actual first day. For the last two weeks all I have been able to think about is leaving her. I was doing alright the morning of the first day considering I woke up at 4 a.m. thinking of the crazy amount of work I had to do to get ready for my students. My unstable emotions were fairly steady until I went into her room and saw that sweet smile. Here come the tears!

I managed to drive to her school and when we arrived she was in awe of all the new things to discover. I'm pretty sure she forgot who I was and was only interested in this toy that was suspended from the ceiling. Since we don't have a giant playroom full of new toys at our house, she did not care about anything but the toys and the boys. Yes the boys. 

Vivie made a new friend named Xavier, and they locked eyes immediately. Maybe she is in love - he was pretty cute! Of course I was acting like a crazy person crying, but after many hugs from her sweet teachers I was able to leave. I had no idea how hard that would be, but once I got to school and saw my wonderful friends, I was feeling ok.

The teachers told me I could call as much as I wanted, but not wanting to be that crazy mommy that even I still deal with and I teach 17 year olds, I only called to check in once. Of course she was charming everyone with her sweet smile and laid back personality. 

Once I arrived to pick her up, I felt the first of I'm sure many stings of motherhood. Vivie completely ignored my voice and would not even offer up smile, but continued playing with her new boyfriend. And so it begins. 

All in all I would say that the first day of school was a success for both of us. Day two was so much easier, and I felt very peaceful leaving her to play, experience new things, and spread her sunshine as she always does to those around her. It felt really good to be back in my classroom reading and researching things like symbolic meanings in The Scarlet Letter and literary analysis. It was nice to use my brain again, even though I am still clearing out the cobwebs from the last six months. I hope this experience will make Vivie proud of her mommy, and help her understand that she can work and be a good mother. I hope she reads this one day and realizes she can do anything she wants and be anything she wants to be, but it takes a village to raise a child. Right now that village has been a pillar of strength for me, and as I reflect on what I am sure one day will seem so minor in the grand scheme of life, I am so thankful that Vivie is surrounded by so many who love and adore her. Myself being number one on that list! :)